So if you’re motivated to influence how others perceive you, what sorts of things should you DO? For example,

– Make sure you know (ask if you have to) and follow the norms for the particular social setting and the role you occupy in it. Situations and roles have assigned behaviors and expectations attached. Not meeting them, like laughing at a funeral, will likely get you labeled as a “rebel” or “deviant.”

– Abide by what’s considered polite and socially appropriate in public. Scratching your crotch, sticking your finger up your nose, or belching “Jingle Bells” isn’t likely to put you on anyone’s “A” list.

– Make eye contact and smile. Assume a pleasant, positive attitude.

– Present yourself positively and confidently but with a touch of modesty to keep yourself from sounding like a braggart or show-off.

– Find ways to show your similarity to the other person because this enhances your attractiveness.

– Get people to talk about themselves and use what they say as a springboard for conversational threads.

– Don’t fabricate your self-presentation because it’s hard to recover from being caught in deceit

Remember: Your self-presentation is providing information about you to others to both help define the situation and enable them to know in advance what to expect of you. In return, they present similar information to you for the same purpose. It’s the “dance of the social animal.” You’re both trying to create and manage your individual desired impressions which hopefully will be mutually beneficial.

Have you ever noticed that sometimes when you’re talking with someone, they seem to get frustrated with what you’re saying or how you’re saying it? Saying to you such things as, “Yeah, but what does that mean in the big picture?” Or “How are you going to get there?”

How you think and talk about problems is increasingly becoming significant, particularly in the work world. This is, in part, because how you “prefer to think” is now believed to determine how you’ll handle assigned tasks, what you’ll learn and how you’ll learn it, and with whom you’ll work well.

Companies such as Polaroid, IBM, Bank of Boston, and Shell Oil have looked into how their employees approach, describe, and process information in order to solve problems in the office.

What’s your “preferred thinking style”? How can knowing it help you? In the 80s and 90s organizational development began looking at “whole-brain thinking.” This approach suggested that each of us has a thinking style which results from our brain dominance – that is, the cerebral hemisphere which takes the lead in our cognition.

Research has shown the left hemisphere (or “left brain”) primarily processes verbal, logical, quantitative, and analytical thinking whereas the right hemisphere (“right brain”) primarily addresses visual, spatial, creative, and holistic thinking. Some experts argue, based on these studies, that brain dominance affects personality.

In other words, they believe that if you’re predominantly left-brained, your processes are manifested as statements oriented toward logical reasoning, sequences, facts, and conceptual structures. Thus, left-brains would be more likely to become engineers, accountants, lawyers, or supervisors.

If you’re right-brained, your statements would be expected to reflect orientation toward people, feelings, experiences, patterns and relations. Right-brains would then be expected to become artists, salespeople, social workers, and entrepreneurs. However, it’s important to note that no one with an intact and healthy brain is thought to use one hemisphere exclusively for thinking.

The reason different patterns of brain dominance are considered important by researchers, such as Ned Herrmann of Applied Creative Services, Lake Lure, NC, is that they tend to lead to different skills, different career choices, different modes of thought, and different styles of communication.

But what is this really showing you? Do thinking preferences represent skills, intelligence, or level of competence? No! They are the pathways by which you are predisposed, perhaps genetically and socially, to solve problems.

Thinking styles are important because collaboration and communication can be difficult if thinking differences are not acknowledged and addressed. – as when I’m talking in straight lines and you’re talking in spirals.

Lest you think one style is better than the other, the whole-brain approach strongly supports the notion that both left-brain and right-brain thinking styles are equally valid and valuable. Both need to be cultivated at all levels of an organization.

In fact, research at the Harvard Business School has demonstrated that the higher up you go in the organization, the more important it is to combine right-brain intuition with left-brain rationality.

Effective managers, for example, use intuition during all phases of the problem-solving process. They combine a gut feeling that points them in a given direction with systematic analysis, quantified data, and thoughtfulness. They also tend to value thinking differences in themselves and others.

Your preferred thinking style affects your perception of the best way to communicate and collaborate. It suggests the words you use and the sequence in which you use them. How you communicate can cause people to move toward you or away from you.

For example, if you talk to right-brains about details, numbers, facts, and sequences, they’ll tend to turn off, experience actual physiological stress, and want to shout, “What are you doing?” If, on the other hand, you present left-brains with pictures, metaphors, and analogies, they’ll feel like hopping up and down, screaming, “How are you going to do it?”

Knowing that you and others have disparate thinking styles can lead to a recognition and appreciation of different cognitive frameworks, which, in turn, can lead to greater sensitivity, understanding, and tolerance. One size and style definitely does not fit all!

Instead, the two styles working together produce a synergy, increasing the overall effectiveness more than either one alone. By generating awareness of thinking styles and valuing those differences, the whole-brain approach both allows and fosters creativity. For companies this can be helpful for hiring, firing, promoting, assigning tasks, and building teams.

You can discover your own thinking style. You can discover your own thinking resources and potential. You can determine that power and potential in others. As a problem solver, you can feel freer to try new things. You can match people and tasks more effectively. And, you can see and break down communication barriers which inhibit productivity and work and life satisfaction by addressing the other person in the mode they find most understandable.

Try this quick quiz which is based on the Herrmann Brain Dominance Profile, a 120-item questionnaire, which shows you not only how you think but also how you like to think.

– Which work element do you prefer? A. Brainstorming B. Planning
– What word best describes your interest in things? A. What? B. How?
– What word best describes you? A. Creative B. Analytical
– Which hobby do prefer? A. Gardening B. Home improvements
– Which statement applies to you more? A. “I rely on hunches and the feeling of ‘rightness’ or ‘wrongness’ when working on a problem’s solution.” B. “I dislike things being uncertain and unpredictable.”

Three or more “A”s means you tend to be more right-brained, preferring feelings, relationships, and qualitative information. Three of more “B”s means you tend to be more left-brained, preferring logic, sequences, and quantitative information. Now see if you can figure out what other people might be and how best to communicate with their preferred thinking style.